Honey, the Kids are Moving Back Home!


moving homeWhen parents raise their kids and get them up to that all-important age of 18 years old, they are prepared to say goodbye. This is because the teenager is usually moving on to their own, independent life either by going to college or getting out into the working world. These days, however, there is a new trend of college students moving back home in order to save money. What’s going on? After all, aren’t college kids the ones who like to go out and party? How in the world can they enjoy living back home with mom and dad?

Although many parents are sad to see their kids leave for college, commonly called empty nest syndrome, most of them get used to the idea of their new lives. In fact, many parents relish the idea of having the ultimate freedom to do what they want in life after finally raising their child to 18 years old. That’s why it can be quite an adjustment to have your grown college student living back in your house. This leads to the question of how can you make the process of living together again less of an imposition? Here are some ideas and tips to get you started when you find out that your college kid is moving back home:

Boundaries from the get-go

You have to think about your college student moving home almost like you’ve just taken in a tenant. There should be boundaries and rules put into place for what you will and won’t accept in your house. For instance, is there a specific time that you want the house locked down for the evening? Many parents don’t want their college student to be coming and going at all hours of the night like they are living in a dorm. As the owner of the home and the landlordâ, you are perfectly within your rights to set up rules that they are expected to follow.

Delegate some chores

Just because your college student is moving home doesn’t mean that they are relieved of housework duties. If they are going to be living in your property, they need to have certain cleaning tasks that they take care of. Remember that you’re trying to prepare your college student for the real world after they graduate. Letting them be a slob around your house is not teaching them anything.  I remember when some of our Composite doors had been abused and my Mom asked me to clean them.  It was my chore and I did it!

Paying your fair share

Financial contributions: Even though your college student has moved home due to financial reasons, that doesn’t mean that they shouldn’t contribute something to the household. Even if it is as simple as paying a quarter of the electric bill each month, your student needs to understand that they have to pay their way in life. Most college students have some kind of a part-time job to pay for their car insurance and gas. Sit down with them before they move in to decide what part of the bills will be theirs to pay. You don’t want them to move home and start living off of you again because that will only set them back from becoming independent after they graduate.

Teaching opportunity

For some empty nest parents, having a college student move back home can be a wonderful thing. You might feel great about getting to take care of someone else again. However, remember that your needs are not the only ones in play here. It’s much more important to make sure that your college student gets a real world wake-up call. The whole purpose of sending them for higher education is so that they can go out and be independent in their lives. You want them to be successful not only in their career, but also in their personal life. That’s why having these boundaries and rules in place is so important.

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Written by Jon the Saver

This post was written by yours truly, Jon Elder. My mission is to help you succeed in your personal finance life. Join me on the journey to financial freedom! You can subscribe through RSS FEED or EMAIL updates. You can also find me on TWITTER
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Jon the Saver

This post was written by yours truly, Jon Elder. My mission is to help you succeed in your personal finance life. Join me on the journey to financial freedom! You can subscribe through RSS FEED or EMAIL updates. You can also find me on TWITTER and FACEBOOK . Happy investing :)

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Comments

  1. I am wondering when you are going to start applying Biblical principles to your writing. How would you approach this topic Biblically, and would it support your current position?

    • Jon the Saver says:

      Hmm, that is a very interesting question! This was written from my experience and moving back home. It’s more of a practical common sense approach that my parents took. Well, for paying your fair share, not so much but it’s something I’d do with my kids.

      As for the biblical side, I’ll have to revisit this topic and dig into what the Word says, thanks for sparking another future article Greg!

      Btw, how’s the blog running? Cain for president?

    • I consider myself to be a bit of a worldly woman so I may not be as well versed in Biblical scripture as the rest of you. However, I have thumbed through the Bible a time or two, and I see nothing in this blog post that’s inconsistent with the Word.

      Moving on. When I was in college I wouldn’t even go home for the summer. I’d rather stay and attend classes, work, and enjoy the freedom of being an adult. However, if I did have to return home, I’d feel obligated to help my mother out. She did her job. And to show how great of a job she did, I’ve chosen to not burden her financially as she approaches her retirement years.

      • Jon the Saver says:

        THANK YOU! There is nothing wrong with using certain points without citing scripture. I think these views align with a Biblical standpoint also. Thanks for the comment Shawanda.

  2. The economy is rough on everybody these days. You brought up some great points to go over before moving back home. It’s good to set up boundary and expectations. I always get a kick out of this topic because I’m from Thailand and parents want the kid to live with them as long as they can. :)

  3. My kids moved home for a short time after they graduated college to save enough money to move out. When adult children move home, you must set rules and have a clear understanding of what is expected. It makes life a lot easier, if you do.

  4. ” Lazy hands make for poverty,
    but diligent hands bring wealth.”– Proverbs 10:14
    Kids need to grow up and get out. College kids, I understand. That makes sense–but when they want to move back I think that is ridiculous. Unless there is a major crisis then I say they don’t ever need to allowed to move back. ESPECIALLY the men. Men need to start becoming men and quit being allowed to stay boys for so long.

    The economy is harsh right now — but life is harsh. Young adults need to be taught how to save and how to WORK. Proverbs is right on the money–no pun intended.

    Also, I agree with GW—you need to start incorporating more Jesus in your articles … especially since wisdom stems from God alone. :) <3

    • Jon the Saver says:

      Nice comment Hannah. I will be incorporating more Bible into future posts, be on the lookout for those! I agree, Men need to move out and grow up! No more of this 30 year old little kid syndrome garbage!

    • Sounds like you two could benefit greatly from pre-marriage counselling (hint, hint).

      That Shawanda has “flipped through the Word” is all fine and good. However, that doesn’t really cut it for me.

      God did not design parents as a safety net. Quite to the contrary, as parents, we are to train and equip our children. Train them for what? To, hopefully, be men and women of God, fulfilling God’s design for marriage. What does that look like?

      Well, Genesis 2:24 says, “a man shall LEAVE his family and CLEAVE to his wife…” The first command here is that we leave our families to create new families. What about if you’re single? Does this apply? YES.

      God desires that we come to maturity as people, and as children of God. This is a critical component of marriage: you need to know yourself. How do you know yourself? Make your own way in the world. How can you come to maturity or adulthood (despite your age) if you are living in your parents basement (no offense, Jon, you were in college)? You can’t.

      I have returned to financial zero twice in my adult life. Did I move back home? Nope. I soldiered on, worked hard, and became a more complete person for the experience.

      I could go on, but I would deprive Jon of the education of researching an article on this subject.

      • Jon the Saver says:

        I don’t disagree with a single thing you’ve mentioned Greg. Spot on. As for the pre-marriage counseling, we’re already on it :)

  5. Relocation says:

    Very interesting thoughts…

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